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Writing Your Wedding Vows the Way Poets
Do
By Chris Simeral, creator of The Ultimate Wedding Vow Toolkit
Let's face it, not many of us have the kind of skills or experience to
write truly poetic wedding vows. Or do we? Here's the truth: Even if you
don't know Dylan Thomas from Bob Dylan, and you're pretty sure T.S.
Elliot was that guy who wrote the words to Andrew Lloyd Weber's "Cats,"
all is not lost! In fact, there are ways to learn to write the words you
want. With four simple steps, you can take what you feel in your heart
and make it come out as sweetly as any Shakespearian sonnet.
Step 1: Decide on a theme
Finding a theme should arguably be the easiest part of writing poetry
for your wedding vows. But you don't want to be stuck with something
trite or cliché, even though the theme of romantic love is probably the
oldest known for poetry. There are lots of ways to avoid writing the
same old "roses are red, violets are blue" type of poem. One trick the
pros use is to envision what a newspaper article about your relationship
would say. Would it discuss how and where you met? How your relationship
has stayed strong, even during the hard times? What your love has meant
to one another? Since newspaper articles get right to the point, this
exercise can help you pick out an overriding theme for your vows.
Step 2: Allow time for reverie
No, not "revelry" (hopefully that will be what your wedding day is all
about), but reverie - a quiet time devoted to a kind of dreamy
meditation. Try some tricks for allowing yourself time to truly think
about your poem - and not just those things that allow you to "act like
a poet." Go for a walk alone, listen to instrumental music, or simply
shut the door to a room in your house and ask not to be disturbed. The
most important thing to remember with any of these methods is that you
don't let other people interrupt your time.
Step 3: Choose your topic
Theme, as discussed above, is the driving idea behind your poem. The
topic, however, is the specific vehicle you use to express the theme.
While finding the theme should be the easiest part of writing a poem for
your wedding, finding a topic that isn't hackneyed and trite can be a
challenge. For instance, love is your theme, but the beauty of your
betrothed's eyes may be the topic. You are using the example of her eyes
as the symbol for your love. The key is to find something new. There's
something that makes your chosen one special, be it appearance, wit, or
style. That's the topic you want to choose. Poets use tools like
automatic writing, journals, or "dream work" to come up with topics for
their prose. (These tools are all discussed in detail in the home-study
course I put together for couples personalizing their wedding vows –
visit
http://www.WeddingVowToolkit.com for more info.) But anything
that allows you to spark your creativity can suffice if you're short on
time.
Step 4: Pick Your Style
As many different poems as there are, there are almost an equal number
of styles in which they are written. There are traditional forms,
modern, post modern, and many more. You can work on fitting your rough
draft poem into one of these many forms, or you can go with no form at
all. The benefit of working on an art form is that there are no hard and
fast rules on what the end product must look like. Perhaps you'd like to
try your hand at penning your vows in the form of a Shakespearean
sonnet. Or, to go a completely different route, maybe "experimental" is
right up your alley. No matter what you choose, just make sure it fits
your style. After all, personalizing your wedding vows means just that –
they should be personal, not forced to fit into a style that just isn't
"you."
About the Author
Chris Simeral is the creator of The Ultimate Wedding Vow Toolkit, the
wedding-coordinator-approved home-study course for couples personalizing
or renewing their wedding vows.
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